Insert Funny Title Here

Ye olde groupe

2006-02-08T20:05:00.001+10:30

Over the years I have noticed that there has been a lot of groups poping up everynow and then, some stay others die out.
And with this latest group influx (if its not spelt right I blame the government), I have taken on the duty of creating a list so that said groups can be easily identified.

Skaters: A dieing breed, known for low pants and lower IQs often hang in groups of threes, can be seen in most local town, wearing backpacks full of well nothing, and wearing baseball caps.
The Fake Skater: These have only come to light very recently, after the unfortunate rise of Avril Lavigne. These can be clearly seen in any shopping outlet as the ones with the big pants, tiny tops and stripey ties, which they have clearly just bought at a well-known chain of shops famed for their cheap accessories.
Surfies (1): The laid back, stoner types that have that nothing seems to bother me look except that I'm in class not smoking weed.
Surfies (2): wanna be surfies, these types are overly aggressive, usually on account of the fact that they haven't had their daily weed hit.
Emos: Try hard goths who think the only way to be individuals and non-conformasts is to all dress alike and listen to the same music. Can often be heard having fights with skaters. all have black hair that they do flippy things with, their pants are the opposite of skaters in the fact that they are skin tight. The males are usually Bi.
Skinhead/Skip: Know for there low baggy pants and baggy shirts. They seem to lack the ability to use their arms when they walk, possibly because they are holding up said baggy pants. Can often be heard saying "Fuck (pronounced FAK) you cunt, wanna faking rubble cunt." Aviod eye contact with this type or they will try to fight you.
Indie chick/dude: much like the emo but with out the black hair, often listen to better music.

There are more but I got bored half way through......I bet you did too so see ya later alligator and don't forget your poxy-adhesive.
Im the moleman and your funny lookin'
MOLE OUT.

Fear of the non-believer

2006-02-02T20:13:00.000+10:30

Christians, is there an other word that as much fear in the hearts of regualr people, well yes its Exam but that comes later, right now im focusing on Christians, they can scene when there is a theological discusion around and then home-in and strike.
"the bible says this......the bible says that.......the bible told me to kill my entire family."
I just think shut the fuck up.
But then again I have been known to say that to everyone.
Christians believe that any discussion no matter how far removed from the bible is always linked to the bible. Here are some quotes taken from real life christains.

"you know last night I had a dream a Jesus told me the answers to todays test."
"I don't care what you think, I know that the bible is true and I'll keep believing it until you prove otherwise."
"Can you believe that Thanh doesn't believe in god?"
my reply
"Yes. hes buddihist. Buddihists don't believe in god. because they have what you don't and thats the ability to take your life in your own hands."

Now, christians like to quote the bible, no, they love to quote the bible, it turns them on. So I thought Id share some bible quotes that christians seem to just flip past.

If your right eye causes you to sin, pluck it out and throw it way.
Mattew 5:27
....And the Lord was with Judah; and he drave out the inhabitants of the mountain; but could not drive out the inhabitants of the valley because they had chariots of Iron.
Jud 1:19 (see you can beat god just build shit out of iron).
All these signs should follow them that believe; in my name they shall cast out the devil; they shall speak with new tongues; They shall take up serpants; and if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them; they shall lay hands on the sick and they shall recover.
mark 16:17-18 (i don't see any of those bible bashing christains drinking posion and surviving nor do they heal other with a simple touch)
I ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.
Matt 17:20 (see christain you can move mountains so go ahead and see if you are really a beliver, go ahead do it.)

Well thats all i got so till next time Im the Moleman and your either with us or your against us.
MOLE OUT.

How do you do? WHO? you.

2005-12-31T13:26:00.000+10:30

I don't know why but for some reason, Ive never really liked mirrors. It may have something to do with the fact that they always seem to break when Im near them, or the fact that when they break I get another 7 years bad luck, or maybe its that when they break the pieces fly out in a reflective shower of pain and embed themselves into my skin causeing blood to stream out of the lacerations and stain the walls and carpets, which I am then forced to clean by my evil step mother and three ugly step sister (who next to me would look extremely attractive).

Boy do I have good self-esteem.

But seriously, I do hate mirrors, and its not for any of the reasons that I mentioned before.
No its the simple fact that every time I find a mirror, or similarly refeclive surface, they always end at my chest. So when I try to gazed deeply in to my green eyes, all I end up seeing the top of my beer belly and my man bosoms (I might add though I can make my man melons dance to the tune of the nutcracker, complete with encore).
And if I had a choice between looking in to my eyes, my only feature that doesn't send the opposite sex screaming as the attempt to all flee at once, or my beer gut and male boobies, then I would choose neither.....I would much prefer to stare at my wonderfully toned bottom.

Till I finish pulling shards of glass from my face I'm the Moleman and your beautiful. PSYCHE.
MOLE OUT.

Radio Waves

2005-12-11T11:26:00.000+10:30

Ok I went to 3D and attended the "training" session, which was 4 hours of an old lady telling us what we could or could not say, we can't swear, or say anything defamitary, (I guess that means Lindsay isn't allowed to talk anymore) and we can't play songs that have to many swear words...and by too many I mean any.
And if the facist radio trainers weren't enough, I have to work with two "indy" people who think Tori Amos is in the same league as Twisted Sister, and think that Green Day (current) is a hrad core rock band.

But it's all worth it as I get to be on radio, and I get to choose all my own music, from a library of like 30,000 CD and 7000 vinyls, yah!

Well thats about the only thing thats happened lately, I think I'll go play basketball in this lovely 37 degree (C) day. Because its the new IN thing.

Till I pass out from sun stroke, or listening to bear vs shark, I'm the Moleman and your my favourite out of everyone, yes you, no not you the other one, yeah thats the one.
MOLE OUT

Motivate This!

2005-12-08T17:21:00.000+10:30

I'm doing ABW (aussie business week) this week, yah we won, and for some reason they think that year 10 students, need to be motivated (just because teachers are so drepressed because they entered a career with no future and didn't realise until it was too late, doesn't mean 16 year old kids want or need to be motivated).

So these moltivational people come in and the first one starts to tell us that everyone is perfect just the way they are, then the second one comes and tells us that everyone has something about them selves to change and that if they dont see it then they are blind to the light.

And then a third came in and told us that no matter what anyone says, what you feel is right (which opens the paradox of if you think she is wrong and feel that no matter what she says your right, you actually think she is right).

I also found that there is a common trend with motivational speakers, one they always SHOUT, (no matter what their on about, every SECOND word IS probably GONNA be SHOUTED. Is this because it makes their point more obvious or just because they feel the need to shout because it makes them feel POWERFUL).
Two they always tell you about how much money they make.
And three they always tell "don't take my word for it, go on google and chech the facts."
Go on google, go on google, why not ask jeeves, what is it too inferior is google now the only search engine or is it just that google is now paying all motivational talkers to send people to their site.

Maybe I should try that...although the motivational speakers would have to be contempt to be payed in cans.

Well thats my little rave for today.
Till you find a better page (like thats hard just "go to google") I'm The MoleMan and your pathetic.
MOLE OUT.

Fun With Dislocation

2005-12-06T18:09:00.000+10:30

Today I dislocated my index finger, and then popped it back into place. And as I type this, I keep using it to push the keys.

But on to more pressing matters and that is the fact that right now I am worth around $2.24 Million.

Okay so I not really worth that much, but in the ABW, I am.

But now on to even more important info, very soon I will have my own radio show on 3D thats 93.7 FM in Adelaide, tuesdays at 4 pm.
So if youd like to hear your name on the radio just say so in the comment section.

I'll leave you tonight with one of the only good pictures of me (and thats saying alot) which was taken on friday night about 30 minutes before I got plasted, so I was a little tipsy. Yah.

Broken...like my heart

2005-12-01T17:52:00.001+10:30

Dumped...dumped...dumped, it couldn't have have come at a better time.
Parties are just about to happen, and i'm heading into year eleven, if I had a girlfriend than what would I...oh who am I kidding, i'm so sad, I'm destined to be lonely.

Until the next one and then it's gonna be all lovey duvvy, kissy kissy, no pants any more, sexy sexy sex sex.
Oh who am I kidding there aren't gonna be any more, I've struck out in the world series of love (thank you *M*A*S*H*).

Well I'm too drepressed to be funny (as if I'm ever funny), so I'll read you a song I wrote:

I wanna tell you, you're special.
I wanna tell you, you're great.
But I was brought up never to lie,
so tell you that, would be a mistake.
(piano solo)
I wanna tell you, you're sexy.
I wanna tell you, you're hot.
But to me lying is wrong,
so telling you i'm not.
(meaningful 80's guitar solo)
I'm not gonna weep,
I'm not gonna cry.
mainly beacause my tear ducts are dry.

thank you and good night, try the veal.

till I find the love super glue, I'm the MoleMan, and you may be the next MoleLady, so look out.

MOLE OUT.

Are You Retarted (not the original).

2005-11-25T18:11:00.000+10:30

Quick answer, Yes.
Long answer, Fuck yes. (because there's more words).

What is so special about the sentence Oozy rat in a sanitary zoo.
Oh I see.

But on a more serious note, heres a list of stange things I've found on or in or around my person, also where I found them:

a pen in my undies, don't know why, or how.
a cotton bud in my navel. long story
several undies in my undies. they were put there before i put them on and I forgot to take them out.
i once found a red stain on the back of my neck and on my pillow, that turned out to be the melted remains of a frosty fruit.
spagetti shapes, in my mouth, un-eaten, they had been there for 4 hours.
I once put a bean bag bean up my nose, that was fun.
I often wake up with one or more fingers in one or more holes. (nose, mouth, other mouth, ear etc)
a near hole packet of burnt matches in my hair.
shaving cream moustache.
jelly crystals all over my body. Year 7 camp...lots of fun.

well thats all I can think of.

You know what pisses me off? no well maybe you should listen more. Or you could just read the following:

All through primary school and much of the first year of high school, I was the biggest loser, and I liked it because, it gave me something to work off.
Now in year 10, people are starting to like me, I've got a girlfriend (yah), I get invited to shit, I've learnt the way of the sleaze, and have lost a ton of weight. But fuck it's not helpful, as now I'm like everyone else, I have nothing to seperate me from the pack...well except that giant mole thats growing between my eyes (expalins the moleman thing huh).

Well till next time, MOLE OUT.

It's not noramlly like this it's just cold.

2005-11-14T17:24:00.000+10:30

Here are somethings that I should have learnt long ago but only learnt this year.

Knifes if placed of finger and pulled away will hurt.
Wall if run into will also hurt.
Combining the great taste of gravy with the awsome taste of chocolate, does not create the flavour sensation I was hoping for.
If you tell chicks...ladies, that you like chick flicks, they find it cool, if you tell dude that you like chick flicks it has the same effect as running into a wall.
wear make-up for drama is fine, wearing make-up when not a drama, is not so cool.
walking into class sing the first line of the angels "am I ever gonna see your face again." that then leads to the entire class shouting back, no way, fuck you, fuck off. probably isn't a good idea.
eating a whole jar of pickles will make you sick
eating another jar of pickles will do the same.
telling the drive thru person at hungry jacks that you want a big mac, and when they tell you that they don't make big macs, shouting, "the customer is all ways right." won't actually work.
not everyone will believe you if you say, "my computer crashed just before I could save".
slapping random strangers bums is sexual harrasment and may lead to being shouted at.
the guy that plays the piano in david jones is not a busker and will not take two dollars.
it's rude to give buskers 5 bucks then take 4 dollars 95 back
it's even ruder to give them a 5 dollar note then take 6 dollars back
if your dad likes to sleep, it not funny to, at 3 o'clock in the morning make popcorn in a big metal tin.
rolling 5 bowling balls down one lane will lead to you being thrown out of the bowling alley.

there was more but I got bored and though i should stop typing.

MOLE OUT.

What the hell

2005-11-12T20:02:00.000+10:30

what the hell Saathiya, 500 view how the hell did you get 500 views. I mean all you talk about is Islam, Bollywood, Uni, and the simpsons.
Well now it's war I'm stealing your last post ah ha ha ha ha ha ha *cough cough*

Small Pox Infected Blankets....

Ahhhhhhh!!!! I am so fucking ecstatic. No more uni. Let me just get this out of my system: NO MORE UNI!!! Okay, I feel better. So, in celebration of the night I had last night (I didn't do ANYTHING except watch the simpsons - ahhh....heaven) here are 20 important lessons I have learnt from the Simpsons:

Mother mole milk is addictive.
Jesus is equivalent to about 6 leprechauns but is harder to catch.
Gypsies can be vengeful.
Nerds conduct electricity.
Rupert Murdoch is one beautiful man.
Indoor plumbing - the lack of it could kill someone's mother.
All protestors are wrong.
Nuclear power is my friend.
Non-violence never solved anything.

Even monsters need air.
Japanese prisons are fun.
Flanders is a jerk.
Yoyos are cool...no matter what anyone says.
When worms speak they sound like a lamb...if a lamb could speak.
God doesn't like you to desicrate a church by owning it and having week long commandment breaking parties (go figure...I guess all those priests are going to have to move out of the vatican)
Who needs a man in their life when they could have an iguana named Jub Jub instead?
Stealing someone's identity when they go to war is okay so long as everyone likes you better.
Every lefty tree hugger worth their salt pocket mulch and wont eat anything that casts a shadow.
Dolphins are actually murderous jerks...the "assassins of the sea"
All your problems can be solved in a little under twenty minutes.

Alright...now for more celebratory doing nothing (ahhh...so good it feels.)

Love**

You read it...you cant unread it! This particular dirturbing rambling came into existance at 6:02 PM and Saathiya is to blame. 1 comments

MOLE OUT.

I am manly

2005-11-12T17:19:00.000+10:30

Just because I'm not the most tanked guy around, doesn't give you the right to question my manlyness, I'm not saying that anyone who is reading this is questioning my manlyness, but for some reason everyone in my drama class thinks that just beause i run a bit like a girl it means i'm not maculine.

But I am masculine, I once programed the VCR without the instructions, and then I drank milk from the carton, all in my undies, (granted I was setting the VCR to tape Home And Away, and the milk was fat free Skim milk, and the undies were bright pink), yet still people call me a wuss, and a sissy, all because I run like a girl.

But i'll show them all, I'll learn to run like a real man and then I'd like to see the looks on their faces.

MOLE OUT.

The "big" 55

2005-11-09T19:55:00.000+10:30

Wow 55 views...now all I need to do is get like 200 more view, before Saathiya gets anymore views and i'll over take...ha ha how you like those apples.

On a more serious note, I get to spend all weekend with Mrs. Green (also known as Ms. Nicolle), YAH! Down side is I have less than 5 days to learn like 300 lines, BOO! But if all goes to plan I'll catch the bird flu and not have to perform.

Anyway, A Liberated Muppet got me thinking, I need a catchphrase, I mean the stuff I use now is really crap, Till blah blah blah. Honestly you thinks that crap up...oh yeah I do, oops.

But back on topic, catchphrases, I'm thinking:

You can silence the mouth but i'll keep sprouting crap.
3 out of 4 readers can't tell the difference
It's less painful than being eaten alive by a llama
I thought 2 inches WAS big
If the trailers a rocking, I'm wrestling with my ego
Open your minds, and close your eyes...also no flash photography

Well these are but a few of the phrases I'm considering, tell me what you think.

Till...oh screw it these suck anyway. MOLE OUT.

Well that was a let down

2005-11-08T16:10:00.000+10:30

Sometimes things sound like fun but if you think about them, there not. skiing is one, the rush of going down a beautiful mountain side, not a care in the world, sounds like fun huh? wrong! Ever heard of frost bite, broken bones, shatted egos. These are but a few of the perils that wait for you if you try skiing.
Bungee jumping, sounds fun, wrong again. The huge drop sometimes literally blows holes in your stomach wall. Does that sound fun? To the untrained eye...ear it does, but hole in walls aren't ever good.
Monkey bars, little kiddies play things. Yeah that are placed over what is pretty much just over sized splinters, not to mention the massive drop.
2 minute noodles, the premise of noodles in 2 minutes sounds great, but the truth is it sometimes takes over 2 and 1/2 minutes...shocking I know. Also noodle lash, when you are sucking that last noodle down and it flicks all the juice in your eye, can cause temperary blindness.

Macaroni and cheese, how can anything with cheese be bad you ask? Well have you ever tasted Mac and Cheese it's like licking the inside of a sneaker after a 12 Km marathon.
Blogging. Sounds fun, is fun...until you realise that no-one ever looks at your site (boo-hoo), and then you run out of ideas and end up writing about what sounds good but really isn't.

So remember people keep questioning everything.

Till I'm allowed back in to the adult bookshop I'm moleman and your my best friend

Psyche!
MOLE OUT!

questions that scare me

2005-11-07T18:38:00.000+10:30

some times in life there are question that really scare the shit out of me here they are...some even have answers. Oh the marvals of technology.

what did you think of dinner?
it was ummmm...whats for dessert.

do you like me?
(say yes say yes damn it say yes) not really. (smooth lindsay real smooth)

so lindsay did you do the homework?
ok what happened is that there was a black out just before i could save and then i tried to turn the computer on and it melted. But i did do it.

how big is it really?

are you ok in there?

excuse me sir but do you have id?
ok, here what happened...(runs away crying)

hey Lindsay could you help me out here?

and finally

has any one seen that ten dollars that was lying just here?

till once again I deficate on your front lawn i'm mole man and your slighty smaller than me. MOLE OUT.

stupid mouth

2005-11-07T18:20:00.000+10:30

For some reason or another, when it come to the female sex (he he sex) I seem to not be able to say what i want to until it's too late or they are drunk.
And it's not puberty as I'm still waiting to hit that (yeah now you laugh), but like I like someone then they ask me out and my brain says yes but by the time it reaches my mouth it has become no (stupid shyness) or I ask someone out after they had a crush on me.

Why oh why am I so socially inept, and why oh why, do people tell me they like, after they stop liking me (gold star if you can understand that). Do they find some sort of sick fun from watching a grown man (i use man very loosely, like action man) cry, or is it that they never liked me and it's all some sort of plot that every girl in the world is to avoid me.

please tell me i'd like to know

to post or not to post?

2005-11-03T20:57:00.000+10:30

Some people who will remain name-less have questioned my ability to post on a regular basis, so here Iam typing about typing, and osting about posting.
But who in there right mind could post three times a day every day of the week, i'll tell you who, pot smoking, two minute noodle eating, beatpoetry listening, indie newspaperreading, get a real degree un-able to, art students thats who. Further more who can find anything to type about i mean i'm struggling to type anything about anything.
i guess i just like stuff too much and have nothing to complain about.

Till I trip over and land on the keyboard again, this has been Moleman, goodnight planet earth.

Pushing it back

2005-11-01T18:02:00.000+10:30

When it comes to homework, I have one philosophy "Don't put something off till tomorrow, what you can do the day after".
Since year 7 (seventh grade) putting off homework has been something of an artform to me. I'm so good at it that I once put off doing a 7000 word essay till the lesson before it was due, and still ended up with a half decent mark.
Yet that isn't enough for me during my "WILD" 16 year old crack cocanie infused school days, I have started to just not do half the work, and do the other half as late as possible, hoping for near 100% as to get that passing grade.
I sure next year when i start year 11, that i will start to do the home work, and only time will tell.

Now i must go and complete an essay that was due last term, till next we meet...I AM YOUR ONE TRUE GOD! FEAR ME AND MY AMAZING POWERS! RAAARRRRGGGGH!
(hot lesbians, nude nude nude, waxing.) <------I am so sorry but i need the reader. MOLEY OUT.

does hair really matter

2005-10-30T20:23:00.000+10:30

Has anyone noticed the amount of products for ones hair, and is hair really that important.
It's not just the amount of products, but also the way they market them, the anti dandruff shampoo "head and shoulder" use the line, i never knew i had a problem till i took the scalp health test. Now dandruff can suck, i had it for a while during my el-natural days and never lived down the fact that every one of my black shirts turned white as soon as i turned my head, but seriously it's not that bad, just trying washing your hair everyday with water, it's much cheaper and usually works.

Now hair product are pure evil they do some times help us, i often spend hours getting my hair right, only to have the wind ruin it. But hair products (mainly hairspray) give me that natural looking lift i desire nay i deserve.
You know what? forget everything i've said just go out there and buy as many and as much of those beautiful hair products and use them all the time, as there is nothing worse then having bad hair, except Bird Flu...no wait bad hair IS worse.

keep questioning the system, and remember every every 8000th peanut is controling the world with min control drug (the fat kid near the bike shed told me).

oh yeah and hot sexy threesomes.
sorry i did it so more people would stumble on to my site.
till next time MOLEMAN, OUT.

The molemans amazing traits, that aren't really that amazing

2005-10-24T18:16:00.000+09:30

I have some weird habits; so here they are, listed in categories, for your reading pleasure.

Eating:

When eating chocolate ice cream or ice cream with chocolate sauce, I always mix it in to a single pile of mush that resembles a case of bad the runs.

Again with ice cream, any other flavour (but usually with gelati/gelato) I will only eat from the bottom half (it sounds weird I know).

Cereal must be soggy; if it’s still crunchy, I hate eating it.

Milk must have a long time till it’s off, one or two days away and I start to smell it before I pour it, after I pour it, just before I consume it.

Tv:

I channel hop more than anyone you know (due mainly to my short attention span).

The sound must be at an even number I never use the odds.

I can hear if the TV is on even if the sound is muted and I’m in another room.

General:

I uncontrollably bounce my right leg if my foot isn’t flat on the ground.

If I’m in a place where spider may or still inhabit I always feel they are crawling up my leg.

I watch crappy kids shows and then realise that I’m smiling so I suddenly make fun of the show (just in case some one is watching me eg my evil sister).

So I will leave you now.

And as the good lord Mr. Price once said. “paralousey, oh bad pricey.”

THE greatest song in the world

2005-10-16T17:44:00.000+09:30

Finally I've got the lyrics to the greatest song of all time.

and here they are

Raffi's banana phone:

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
Banana phone
Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
Banana phone

I've got this feeling
so appealing
for us to get together and sing - SING!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
Banana phone
Ding dong ding dong ding dong ding
Donana phone

It grows in bunches
I've got my hunches
Its the best
beats the rest
cellular modular
interactivodular

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
Banana phone
Ping pong ping pong ping pong ping
Ponana phone

Its no baloney
It aint a phony
My cellular
Bananular phone

Don't need quarters
don't need dimes
to call a friend of mine
dont need computer or tv
to have a real good time
I'll call for pizza
I'll call my cat
I'll call the whitehouse, have a chat
I'll place a call around the world
Operator get me beijing jing jing jing

(instrumental bridge - break dance here)

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring
Banana phone
Ying yang ying yang ying yang ying
Yanana phone
It's a real live mama and papa phone
a brother and sister and a dogaphone
a grandpa phone and a grandma phone too - oh yeah
my cellular bananular phone

Banana phone
ring... ring... ring...
Its a phone with appeal (a peel)

Banana phone
ring... ring... ring...
Now you can have your phone and eat it too
Banana phone
ring... ring... ring...
This song drives me .... bananas
Banana phone
ring... ring... ring...

Bo ba do ba do do doob

get out there and download it yah creeps before some guy turns it in to a stupid ringtone, or you hear it while seeing some shitty movie like duece bigalow two. (it happened with my precious NUMA NUMA.)

http://discspace.homeip.net/out/raffi%20-%20banana%20phone.mp3

and remember dig deep enough you'll meet a mole.

Get to know the Mole man

2005-10-07T20:45:00.000+09:30

If you could be anything what would you be?

Ooooh a rock, no wait... a pile of rocks, that way I would always rock.
get it? rock, because I'm a rock. It really makes you think.

What feature are you most proud of?

The third knuckle on my left hand... oh you're so pretty, I know you want me, you little knuckle wuckle you. Also my foul mouth. poo wee fart bum, he he he.

How often would you shower in a week?

Well lets see, 7 days in a week (pause) carry the one (counts fingers) once, and thats only every a dry shower, just to get rid of the dry sweat and dead skin, which I collect in a jar and eat as an after school snack.

You are given 3 wishes, what do you wish for?

A pony.

And the other 2 wishes?

2 more ponies.

Finally what is your name?

Damn trick questions, ummmm steve?

Sorry incorrect, better luck next time.

Toe nail clipping are just as good as regular food

2005-10-03T12:49:00.000+09:30

I'm sick and tired of every one bagging toe nail clippings, sure they are annoying if theare left on the floor and then weeks later you find one stuck to your foot. But they have so many uses like a substitute for tooth picks or cotton eye cleaners (make sure it's a big toe nail, you don't want to be ear fishing and lose the nail in you ear), but the most useful thing a toe nail can be used for is food.
Just think, Toe nail ala spam, and that stuff you find under the nail, Mmmm mmmm delicious, if you collect enough of it, you can spread it on your toast in the morning, it has a wonderful nutty flavour, and an after taste of cheese.

so next time you cut your toe nail and are about to put them in the bin, stop and try one I promise you won't be dissapointed.

till I post again this is moleman, have a good molenium (m-ol-en-e-um). meh never mind.

my favourite MR. Price quotes (most have been taken out of context)

2005-10-02T18:50:00.000+09:30

Mr. Price is a teacher at my school who is known by every student for his non-sensical ramblings and hilariously stupid phrases.

20. the dead boy sat right there in that seat (pointing to the seat that i was sitting in)... no wait that was at another school.
19. if one more person asks me to be quiet...I will just...yeah...ok i'm going to shut up now.
18. she told me she was a lesbian, but it turned out she was gay.
17. The answer is in the back of your books...what do you think you're doing? Close those books!
16. lets hear from Alex he always has something intellegent to say (alex says something)... You are the stupidest person I have ever met.
15. What do you mean I didn't tell you about the test... I told you yesterday (this was taken from a lesson we had on monday).
14. Even in the with my eyes closed, she was the ugliest person I had ever seen.
13. I would love to give you a verbal spray.
12. If even one of you gets this question wrong I'm failing all of you, especially you (pointing at me)
11. She told the police I was stalking her...the truth is she dropped her wallet and i was trying to return it (pause, smiles) well thats what I told them (laughs) seriously though thats what i was doing
10. I like objects
9. I'll make it all oral
8. And I found a dead baby in her locker
7. needless to say the principal was not happy
6. I'd like to just... oh bad Pricey
5. just like the game show the Price is right ( long pause) I'm trying to say is that I'm correct
4. the scouts could be the security...who would mess with the scouts?
3. some times I see a student and just think...I'm sure she enjoys it...I'm talking about sex, people!
2. I'd never seen someone vomit so much!
1. show some respect people and watch the damn credits (upon the conclusion of any movie).

Molemans top 10

2005-10-02T18:11:00.000+09:30

Fav Songs:
10. molian national anthem
9. that la la bomba song
8. shut uppa ya face
7. Numa Numa (drago stei din tei)
6. the mexican hat dance
5. william shatner-Has been (the album)
4. 99 bottles of beer on the wall
3. hail to the bus driver-dance remix
2. that moblie ring tone that goes beep beep da da beep beep
1. girls just want to have fun

reasons I don't have a girlfriend:
10. I have bad hair
9. I tend to get drunk quite easliy
8. I have a phobia of showering
7. I have a blog
6. I once drew a comic strip
5. I'm not very intelligent
4. I have a wandering eye
3. I suffer from a bladder problem
2. my best pick up line is "I suffer from shrinkage...even when it's not cold."
1. I'm GAY

Things I like:
10. cheese
9. Monkeys
8. the number 7
7. <---- this
6. poking myself in the eye
5. Emotion Eric
4. saying babushka
3. throwning paper at people and blaming it on someone else
2. going to the toilet
1. making fart noises in maths class

names i would rather have:
10. Steve
9. Nick
7. Jack
6. Micheal
5. Mark
4. Lineal
3. julius
2. Stephanie
1. anything other than what my parents called me. (i'm not telling you what it is, you can guess).

i think my hands are cheating on me.

2005-09-26T12:20:00.000+09:30

they were with me from the start, we used to do every thing together, we used to open doors together, we used to pick my nose thogether and now that bastard right hand is seeing someone else, and who is this person with whom my hand is fraternising with...no other than my own girlfriend, it's not as if I'm saying this with out any evidence no I was with my lady friend one day and to my horror my left hand was fondling her breast right there in front of me then later on it was squeeze her bum, the sly bastard didn't even try to lie his way out like a real man, no he just stood there like nothing happened.

well i showed him, i took a knife and cut him off, and this time it's for good.

fucking levis

2005-09-24T14:01:00.000+09:30

those stupid people at levis don't know what their are missing, how dare they laugh at my idea of the pant it's fantastic, i mean you get the comfort of knowing that you can't be arrested for indesent exposure with the cool calming affect of feeling the breeze one one of your naked legs.
It's pure genius, well it's pretty clever, ok ok a drunk guy at the end of our street who thinks god lives in a light pole told me it was a good idea and who can argue with that logic? no-one thats who.
Now I have 300 pants with only one leg, what the hell i'm i gonna do with them it's not as if theycould be given to the poor, even they don't want them, not even when I offer to pay them to take it, it's useless.

the stubberning continued

2005-09-23T00:59:00.000+09:30

well i did it i cut one of the legs off my pants and wore them around the neighbourhood, and i learnt some thing, not every one has a sense of humour, and by this i am mainly talking about old lady's with hand bags that when aimed correctly can cause some serious damage especially if said hand bags are made of concrete and are weilded by a body builder but apart from the sever beating i encounted the pant idea went down rather well and i have a meeting with levis tomorrow.

the stubberning

2005-09-18T01:56:00.000+09:30

i stubbed my toe the other night and i really killed and that got me thinking...what would happen in i were to cut one of the legs of a pair of my pants would they then be called pant or would they just be a pair of pants that had been cut by a boy with too much time on his hand there is only one way to find out.

Shakespearen Homie

2005-08-11T19:59:00.000+09:30

What is up'th mine homies,
twas just chilling' inth my crib, whence i did spy a blue street roller.
So thou truest didst popth a cap in thines arse.

So till next good 'morrow i askth thee to keepth it real.

HUMMING IS NOT FUNNY

2005-08-11T13:03:00.000+09:30

As a high school student I am wellaware of the evils of boredom.

So evil is boredom, that it will take away your very soul and sell it for crack cocaine, which it then sells at cut rate prices to the elderly, telling them it's a new form of arthritis medication.

It would sell it's own mother into white slaver, buy her back, then sell her back again.

Yes, it is that evil.

What? I here you say boredom evil, but bordem has saved me from many a boring lechure from my parents by sending me to sleep.

Yes, but it only saved you from it's own its self in order to steal your dream and then sell it to the TV networks for millions.

These may be the ravings of a mad man, but I distinctly remember having a dream about sex that quite possibly took place in a city, remind you of any shows you know? thats what I thought.

PS the government is controling the world by putting mind control drugs into every 8000th peanut.